A is for APL, with ciphers arrayed;
B is for BASIC, for kids and for trade.
successful, from Dennis, of course;
D is dead Dylan, entombed in closed source.
E is the language that limits your trust;
F is for FORTRAN, its decks under dust.
G is for Gödel whose failure was tragic,
H is for Haskell's expression of magic.
I is for Intercal made up in fun,
J is for Java left under the sun.
K is like APL sans its strange faces,
λ's for Lisp with its fond round embraces.
M is ML so your proofs are all sound,
N is the order of growth we must bound.
O for Oberon's slim binary tersity,
P for the Perl of postmodern perversity.
Q was QBASIC in Microsoft's youth,
R stands for art we were taught by Don Knuth.
S is for Smalltalk and corporate spending,
T is for types and huge flamewars unending.
U is for UML's silly CASE tools,
V is for Verilog -- hardware by rules.
W's web-code, the big killer app;
XML's X, better known as "that crap".
Y is recursion so self-referential?
Z specifies everything that's essential.
Hacker, once finished with these ABCs,
Go and make new ones, to play and to please.
Thanks to Shae Erisson and #haskell for several lines and a rhyme; apologies to Dylan and Gödel, which deserve better.
© 1994-2003 by Darius Bacon